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If someone constantly belittles you, you know they’re a narcissist. If they use your insecurities against you, it confirms it.

That’s the basic idea of dealing with a narcissist.

But the truth is, it’s not always that straightforward. Narcissists are masters of manipulation, often turning the most innocent things into weapons to use against you.

Some people seem to have a knack for recognizing and dealing with narcissists. What’s their secret? They’re aware of the 8 specific things that narcissists often weaponize.

Let’s unpack these one by one.

1) Your emotions

Emotions are tricky things.

They ebb and flow, sometimes without any rhyme or reason, and once they’ve taken hold, they’re difficult to shake off. You can only acknowledge them and hope they pass in time.

Now, imagine a narcissist in the picture. They have a knack for exploiting your emotions, adding another layer of complexity to the mix.

Narcissists are experts at manipulating emotions for their own gain. They can sense when you’re vulnerable, when your mood shifts from joy to despair, and when you’re trying to hide your true feelings behind a façade.

If you’re dealing with a narcissist, your emotions become their weapon of choice.

Not so cool, right?

2) Your insecurities

Insecurities, we all have them.

I remember a time when I had a friend who seemed to have a knack for finding my insecurities and using them against me.

She’d bring up my fear of public speaking whenever she wanted to make a point, or my struggles with body image when she wanted to feel superior.

It took me a while to realize that she was a narcissist, weaponizing my insecurities for her own benefit. It seemed like she found joy in making me feel small and insignificant.

Narcissists like her are experts at finding your weak points and using them to their advantage. If you’re dealing with a narcissist, your insecurities could become their favourite tool.

And trust me, it’s not a pleasant experience.

3) Your past mistakes

Everyone has a past, and with it comes mistakes. It’s part of being human.

However, in the hands of a narcissist, your past mistakes can be twisted into a weapon. They might bring up these errors at the most inopportune moments, using them to belittle you or make you feel guilty.

Interestingly, studies have shown that narcissists are more likely to hold grudges and less likely to forgive. They keep a mental record of your slip-ups, ready to use them against you when they feel the need.

With a narcissist, your past can haunt you in unexpected ways.

4) Your relationships

Relationships are a source of strength and support.

But when a narcissist is involved, they might turn your relationships into a battleground. They are skilled at creating divides, causing misunderstandings, and playing people against each other.

They may even try to isolate you from your friends and family, making you more dependent on them. It’s a classic manipulation tactic.

In the hands of a narcissist, your relationships can become a tool for control and manipulation. Be aware, and guard your relationships well.

5) Your accomplishments

We all like to celebrate our victories, big and small.

I remember when I landed a big promotion at work. I was thrilled, and naturally shared the news with my friend. But instead of being happy for me, she found ways to belittle my accomplishment. She made it seem trivial and unimportant.

I later realized that this was classic narcissistic behavior. She was using my accomplishment to make me feel small and unimportant.

A narcissist will often downplay your achievements, or even twist them around to make it about themselves. It’s a way for them to maintain control and keep you in your place.

So, if like me, you find your victories becoming a source of criticism instead of celebration, you might be dealing with a narcissist.

6) Your kindness

Kindness is universally valued. It’s seen as a virtue, a quality that makes us human.

However, in the eyes of a narcissist, your kindness can be seen as a weakness to exploit. They might take your generosity for granted, manipulate your empathy, or use your good nature to their advantage.

It’s a strange thing when kindness, something so inherently positive, is twisted into a tool for manipulation. But that’s exactly what can happen when you’re in the orbit of a narcissist.

Remember, it’s okay to be kind. But it’s also okay to set boundaries and protect yourself.

7) Your patience

Patience is a virtue, right?

It allows us to stay calm in stressful situations, to wait for the right moment, and to endure when things get tough. But when you’re dealing with a narcissist, your patience can be turned into a weapon against you.

A narcissist might take advantage of your patience, pushing your boundaries and testing your limits. They might keep you waiting, break promises, or constantly change plans knowing you’ll tolerate it.

In a twisted way, your strength of being patient becomes their weapon of manipulation. Make sure to recognize when your patience is being exploited, and don’t be afraid to put your foot down.

8) Your love

Love is the foundation of any relationship. It’s a beautiful feeling, one that connects us and makes us feel seen and valued.

But in the hands of a narcissist, your love can be turned into a tool for manipulation. They might use your feelings for them to control you, to make you do things you wouldn’t normally do, or to keep you in a relationship that’s harmful to you.

Your love, something so pure and beautiful, can be weaponized in the most hurtful way. Always remember to protect it, because your love is precious and should never be used against you.

Final thoughts

If you’ve come this far, you’ve probably realized that dealing with a narcissist is no easy task.

Remember, narcissists are often skilled manipulators, capable of turning even the most innocuous things into weapons against you. However, knowledge is power. By being aware of these tactics, you can equip yourself with the tools needed to navigate such situations.

It’s not about demonizing the narcissist or playing the victim. It’s about understanding the dynamics at play and taking steps to protect your emotional well-being.

As psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula once said, “In a narcissist’s world, it’s all about them.” But in your world, it should always be about you. Take care of yourself first and foremost.

Remember – you are valuable, and no one should be allowed to weaponize your emotions, insecurities, or love. Stand strong and remember that your worth is not determined by how others treat you.

We hope that this reflection leaves you more prepared and resilient in the face of such challenges.

The post 8 little things a narcissist will weaponize to use against you appeared first on Small Business Bonfire.

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