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If you’ve ever found yourself feeling drained or taken advantage of in your relationships, you’re not alone.

Often, we give too much to those who don’t quite value us as they should, leaving us feeling depleted and unappreciated.

It’s not always easy to tell when you’re overextending yourself for someone who doesn’t deserve it. But psychology can offer some insight.

This isn’t about blaming others, it’s about self-awareness and learning to set boundaries.

Everyone’s experience with this is different, so understanding the signs can be a bit tricky.

But I’ve got a list of eight key signs to help you figure it out.

Here’s a brief look at what this article, “8 signs you’re giving too much to people who don’t deserve it, according to psychology”, will cover.

Let’s dive in and learn more about recognising and managing over-giving in your relationships.

1) You’re always the one making sacrifices

If you find yourself constantly bending over backwards to meet the needs of others, with little to no reciprocation, it’s a sign you might be giving too much.

Psychology tells us that healthy relationships are about give and take.

But when you’re always the one giving, and the other person is always taking, it becomes a one-sided relationship.

You may feel like you’re the only one putting in effort, making sacrifices, and compromising on your wants and needs. This can leave you feeling drained and unappreciated.

Your needs and wants are just as important as theirs.

If you’re always the one adjusting your plans, making compromises or putting your life on hold for someone else, it may be time to reassess.

This isn’t about being selfish, it’s about self-care. Giving too much to someone who doesn’t value your efforts can be damaging to your self-esteem and overall well-being.

It’s important to recognize this sign and address it before it takes a toll on you.

2) You feel guilty for saying no

There’s a strange thing that happens when you’re giving too much to the wrong people: you start to feel guilty for setting boundaries.

Logically, you know you have every right to say no, to prioritize your own needs, but emotionally, you feel like you’re letting someone down.

This guilt is often a sign that you’re over-extending yourself.

You’re so used to accommodating others that standing up for yourself feels wrong.

But here’s the thing: Saying no is a healthy part of any relationship. It’s a way of respecting your own time, energy, and needs.

If you find yourself feeling guilty or anxious about saying no, it might be a sign that you’re giving too much to someone who doesn’t appreciate your effort.

It’s not your responsibility to meet everyone else’s needs at the expense of your own.

3) Your self-esteem is tied to their approval

When giving too much, it’s common to start relying on the approval of others for your sense of self-worth.

You may feel good when they appreciate your efforts, but if they don’t, you might feel worthless or unimportant.

According to research, this is a common pattern known as external locus of self-esteem, where our self-worth is derived from outside sources rather than from within.

It’s an unhealthy dynamic that can leave you vulnerable to manipulation and emotional exhaustion.

If you notice that your mood and self-esteem are heavily influenced by how others treat you, it might be a sign that you’re investing too much in people who don’t value your worth.

Your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.

4) Your own needs always take a backseat

It’s wonderful to care for others, to be there when they need you. It’s a sign of a big heart and generosity.

But sometimes, in the process of taking care of everyone else, we forget about the person who also needs our care and attention: ourselves.

If you find yourself constantly pushing aside your own needs to cater to others, it’s time to pause.

It’s a sign that you’re giving too much of yourself to people who might not fully appreciate it.

It’s important to remember that tending to your own needs isn’t selfish. It’s necessary. You deserve the same love, care, and attention that you’re willing to give others.

Don’t hesitate to put yourself first sometimes. It doesn’t mean you care any less about others, it just means you’re also caring for yourself.

5) You’re always on call

Picture this: It’s late at night, you’re finally winding down after a long day, and your phone buzzes. It’s that person again, asking for a favor or needing your attention.

Despite your exhaustion, you respond. Sound familiar?

If you’re always available, always responding, always putting other’s immediate needs before your own well-being, it’s a sign that you might be giving too much.

It can feel like you’re constantly on call, waiting for the next crisis or request to come in.

It’s okay to switch off and take time for yourself. Being constantly available doesn’t necessarily make you a better friend or partner; it can just leave you feeling drained and unappreciated.

It’s important to establish boundaries and understand that it’s okay to prioritize your own needs.

6) You feel resentment

I remember a time when I found myself constantly running errands for a friend.

It started off as small favors, but soon, I was picking up her groceries, babysitting her child and even helping with her work assignments.

I didn’t mind helping out, but over time, I realized she rarely returned the favor, or even said thank you.

A sense of resentment began to build in me. I felt taken for granted and unappreciated.

This is a common sign that you are giving too much to someone who isn’t reciprocating your efforts.

Resentment is a strong emotion that can cause strain in any relationship. It’s important to recognize this feeling as it arises and take steps to address the imbalance.

It’s okay to express how you feel and ask for what you need in a relationship.

7) You’re always the peacekeeper

Listen, being the bigger person can be noble. But constantly playing the peacekeeper, smoothing over conflicts, and letting things slide just to avoid arguments? That might be a step too far.

If you’re always the one making amends or sucking up your feelings just to keep the peace, it’s time for a reality check.

This could mean you’re giving too much to people who aren’t willing to do the same for you.

Relationships should be a two-way street. It shouldn’t always be up to you to mend things or avoid conflicts. Stand your ground.

Express your feelings. Don’t let anyone take your peace for granted. You deserve respect and understanding as much as anyone else.

8) You’re losing sight of who you are

Let’s get one thing straight: You are not defined by what you do for others.

If you’ve started to lose sight of your own identity, interests, and passions because you’re consumed with meeting the needs of others, it’s time to step back.

You might be giving too much to people who aren’t appreciating your worth.

Remember, you’re more than just a giver. You have your own dreams, desires, and needs that deserve attention.

Make sure to take time for yourself, indulge in activities you love, and nurture your own growth.

At the end of the day, everyone deserves to be in relationships that are balanced and fulfilling.

Don’t lose yourself in the process of trying to please others. You matter too.

Conclusion

Your worth is not determined by how much you give to others—it’s about who you are as a person.

This article aims to highlight the signs of over-giving and to encourage self-awareness in your relationships.

But ultimately, the decision to enact change lies with you.

Time spent on nurturing your own needs and desires is time well spent.

Being truly self-aware means understanding your own boundaries and not letting others take advantage of your generosity.

Here’s to cultivating healthier, more balanced relationships and living a happier life!

The post 8 signs you’re giving too much to people who don’t deserve it, according to psychology appeared first on Small Business Bonfire.

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